Artists Are Always Young

"Artist are Always Young" this quote was written under my high school year book photo.

I remember the picture well, I had just come back from a swimming class and my hair was a mess. I chucked at the quote, not being terribly impressed at 17 years old, I was more concerned about the unflattering photo.

Me, 2019

Dad' Day at the University of Illinois, where I was majoring in painting and commercial design

In this shot from a local newspaper, I was working from a nude model, circa 1959

Now, many, many years later, I understand. Artists are always young because we are never finished with our work. Just when I get the inclination to put the paints away, I get another idea about developing more techniques for my paintings.

It has been more than 60 years that I have been a working artist.

Just finished this abstract. Encaustic and mixed media, on board

I had a battle convincing my parents to let me be an art major in college. My mother often said, "You are going to have to survive on beans and live in a cold-water flat." She insisted that I take a semester of typing so I could get a job after school. My first job was in the art department in a book publishing company in Chicago.

I always carried a sketchbook when I was traveling with my jazz musician, Kai Winding. I sketched and painted musicians for 12 years.

backstage at the Nice, France jazz festival, circa 1981

Process of a very large mural, circa 1990

My Christmas display in Artisimo Gallery's gift shop. About 23 years ago.

My partners in my first gallery, Artisimo, Scottsdale AZ. Note the T shirts I painted for some occasion.

My first abstract painting done during my second year in art school. Casein on illustration board. circa 1953

It's Too Pretty!

Last post, I showed the lovely blank panel. I worked on this new painting all week. It seemed the more I worked, the more dissatisfied I became. I couldn't put my finger on what was wrong with the painting. After yesterday's studio session, I realized it was just too darn pretty.

I photographed the process. I will look at the last effort for a couple of days before I paint over it.
I know I won't work on it because I have encaustic class to teach for the next couple of days.

Here is the process; cold wax and oil on 60 x 100 cm panel.

Drawing From Life

I haven't been using live models for quite a while and I miss the spontanaity of sketching rapidly. I like using ink since there is no going back to correct - or at least not much.

When I traveled with my late husband, Kai Winding , I always had a sketch pad handy and I would draw as fast as possible, since jazz musicians do not stand still while playing.

Here are some of my sketches:

This is from my book, Yoga for Musicians and Other Special People. Long since out of print.

Nice, France, jazz Festival

Kai winding on the cover of my book

More recent drawings of local models

30 second pose

conté crayon

60 second pose

45 minute pose

What is Art?

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It Is Never Too Late To Live Your Dream

Kai Winding, Chuck Mangione, me

Here is the link if you are interested in purchasing this digital book. It can be read on any device.
http://www.amazon.com/Artists-Memoir-Fireworks-Dawn-ebook/dp/B008G371SC/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1454935726&sr=1-1&keywords=Ezshwan+Winding

It is never too late to live your dream. This is the story of how I changed from an older widow, subsisting on food stamps to a recognized artist, living in joy, peace and fellowship. I moved to San Miguel de Allende, Mexico when I was 70 years old and started life all over again.

Fireworks at Dawn takes the reader on a journey of my life, that can appear like a roller coaster; through betrayals and blessings to this delightful last chapter of my life.

Years earlier, I had felt, If I weren’t me, I would be jealous of me! My husband, Kai Winding, was an internationally known jazz trombonist. The rough parts of the relationship were smoothed, and we relished our deep love and soul connection.
Then my life shattered like a crystal goblet thrown against the wall. Kai, who had been in radiant health, developed a severe and increasingly painful headache. He died five months later from a brain tumor.

Fireworks at Dawn is the story of the dramatic changes in my life and thinking that pushed me from a glamorous, colorful and prosperous life through the painful depths of despair and financial ruin to this wonderful last stage of life.
I yearned for a life rich with colorful experiences, where I could live an artistic life, in a place where I could afford to pay for my basic needs; it was up to me. No one was going to rush in and rescue me. I had to make drastic changes.
When I moved to Mexico, I was still in bankruptcy. My art career was stagnant. Leaving my family was the hardest part of the move. My daughters and grandsons mean the world to me, but I had to convince myself that they didn’t need me anymore. Materially, I had little to lose.
A fine water colorist told me several years ago that being a professional artist was equivalent to jumping off a cliff without a parachute. I agreed.
While writing this book, I have had to scrutinize my whole life – the plethora of choices I have made and resultant mistakes and triumphs.
I was encouraged to write my story. Several people told me that they were interested in what made me who I am. “How did you do it? Why are you now content and at peace?” Through the writing of this book, I had the opportunity to question and release my own judgment and self-criticism. If issues from the past still pushed my emotional buttons, it was time to let them go.
I sincerely hope that this account of my life will motivate others who think they are prisoners of circumstances and that their dreams can not be realized.
It is never too late.

A drawing I made when I was 19 years old, in art school

New Painting, oil over encasutic

I am able to spend an hour a day in the studio now. The pain and exhaustion of Shingle is lessening.

I am continuing with my series; Women Who Changed the World. This one is Rachael Carson.

As with all of this series, I am painting over older encaustic paintings that no longer hold any interest for me. I fuse the first coupe of layers of oil over the encasutic to permanently bond with the back ground. This requires very good ventilation and I wear a mask.

I will be making at least one video of the entire process of how I work. Below, is the starting place; a non-object color study  in encaustic, and yesterday's work. I am almost finished, jut need to work on her hair and the background.

Now, I am really finished!

Here is where it started

stage 2

didn't like the face of the model, so changed it.

couldn't leave this alone. I need someone in the studio to grab the brush out of my hand

I had this painting staring at me every time I walked int the studio and I just couldn't leave it alone.The eyes weren't right; it was ordinary... I wasn't satisfied, so I kept working. More time on a painting isn't necessarily going to make it better. I added encaustic around the head; oil glaze; carved into it and rubbed on copper leaf. O.K. Now it is looking decorative. Time to put it out of sight.

I had told myself that I needed a break from the studio - except for teaching, of course, and I didn't follow my own advise.

Another painting I have been re-working is calling to me. Maybe I can ignore that call for another day.

"Long Ago and Far Away" no more work on this painting!!!

Jazz Paintings

For more than 12 years, I painted and sketched only jazz musicians. I traveled with my late husband to recording sessions, jazz festivals and concerts and always had my sketchbook with me, I drew with ink, working rapidly. The musicians were in action and I wanted to catch the energy. I converted many of these sketches into paintings that I exhibited at the Nice (France) jazz festival every summer. I continued to go to jazz clubs to sketch even after Kai died, but realized after a couple of years that jazz wasn't a big part of my life anymore, and moved on to other series. It is nice to look back and remember that special time.

The paintings are no longer available. All have been sold. One is in a museum permanent collection; another is in a college permanent collection.